Before It's Too Late



Never in my wildest dreams did I ever think I would be reading your obituary so soon. I stared at it for the longest time with my mouth open, not believing what I was reading. Tears rolled down my face, beginning as a trickle and ending with a waterfall!
Deb, I never got to say the things I wanted to say. I know I told you I believed in you when that shit-storm happened at the school. I wrote you that long letter. You called me and we had a very nice talk! I was so happy you trusted me and knew I was someone you could talk to. 
I wanted you to meet my daughter, Jordan. She's my WORLD and I wanted you to see me accomplish something great. You would be so happy to know that I have taken my last class in college to get my teaching degree. I have the Praxis exams and student teaching.... But I did it Deb! I did it. YOU knew I could and would. You always believed in me and knew I was not just lazy and I WAS putting in all my effort! I loved you so dearly for that! Not so sure anyone else believed in me that much. I want to be the teacher you always were! 
It feels like its been forever since you left us and since you are buried in another state, I cannot even visit you. I will keep writing these blogs in hopes that somehow, you can see them. Life is so not fair! You were one of the great ones! Why you had to leave so soon and abruptly! I HATE IT!  I miss you so much! I wrote to your sister and parents. They sent me a beautiful picture back of you and a sweet note.
I hope and pray you are at peace and can rest easy from this HELL on Earth you went thru. I will finish my school, get my degree and make you proud, I promise. I talk with my students the way you put time aside to talk with yours. I tell them everything you always told me. I want your memory to love on.... Either way, IT WILL LIVE ON IN MY HEART!! Rest in peace my dear friend and I love and miss you much! ❤

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